Chan Dharma Community

Summer 2025 Edition

Reflections on the Silent Illumination Dharma Study Course

Dear Friends,

In her book Illumination, Rebecca begins with a quote from Master Hongzhi:

“Stay wtih that just as that. Stay with this just as this.”

It sounds pretty simple and straightforward, doesn’t it? Yet for anyone who has done even a tiny bit of Chan practice, you have encountered how our habitual tendencies can get in the way of following these simple directions. But what are those habitual tendencies and how do we work with them in the practice of Silent Illumination?

Many of us had the privilege to participate in Rebecca’s Dharma Study Course on her book Illumination from Dec 2024 through May 2025. In the course, we learned about common modes of operation, or entrenched habits that people commonly develop in reaction to the present moment. Each class was devoted towards deeply exploring each mode including craving mode, aversion mode, problem-solving mode, and trance mode.

As part of the course, we were asked to relfect on each mode of operation and how we might appy it to ourselves. Then, during each class, various students would share about their reflections and practice over the course of the prior month. Rebecca would synthesize our experiences and questions, and provide valuable teachings to help us better understand the Dharma, correct any misperceptions, and futher our practice with Silent Illumination.

For me, what is most helpful about the course is the multiple types of learning modalities that it includes: reading Dharma, reflecting on the teachings and putting them into practice in daily life, asking questions and having a teacher resolve confusion or uncertainty, and probably most of all, hearing how other practitioners are practicing the Dharma in their own lives. I learned that I am not alone in having a mind that is always racing towards the next problem and that others too struggle with drowsiness while meditating.

Participating in such a course is a true gift as hearing others share about their practice and struggles in life helps us feel more normal by reminding us of our common humanity. Hearing about other’s practice can also help us better apply the teachings of the Dharma to our own situation. I felt very connected to the other students in the course, which was also motivating to my own practice.

In this spirit, we thought it would be helpful to share some experiences of your fellow practitioners. Below you will find reflections from class members about their takeways from participating in the course. We hope that this serves as motivation in your own practice and we encourage you to participate in future Dharma study courses offered by Rebecca and the Chan Dharma Community.

With palms joined,

Brian Pilecki (and on behalf of the CDC Program Committee)

From Max Tabachnik:

We bring our conditioned thinking and behaviors into our practice. Thus, it's easy to erroneously and subtly fold the practice into our unhelpful habits instead of confronting these habits and embracing reality. Rebecca guides us on common failure modes (e.g., problem-solving, intellectualizing, quietism, etc.) to avoid so that we do not delude ourselves and cause ourselves unnecessary suffering. Buddhism is as much about what not to do as it is about what to do.

From Noriko Makita:

The most important thing I'm taking from the course is that it's possible to influence the flow of causes and conditions by pausing, being simply aware of what is happening and not adding any emotional charge to it whether I'm experiencing greed, aversion, or any kind of mode.

From Heather Swope:

While working through the different Modes discussed in "Illumination," I became better aquatinted with how I habitually disengage from the present moment. I have been able to fold these insights into my practice and approach myself and my interactions with others with more compassion and clarity than I previously believed was possible. These teachings, combined with the insights from our Sangha, have been instrumental in helping me achieve more authentic and meaningful experiences. I couldn't be more grateful.

From Sam Edison:

It is hard to narrow it down to just one thing. I feel that I had learned so much about myself and my practice during the months that we shared practicing and learning together. There have been certain retreats that I have been on that had left a mark and altered my practice for the better. This was very much like that, but perhaps more so. I really learned a lot about myself and the habits of my own mind. I realized that a lot of my practice was being misdirected in a way, being used in an attempt to escape things that I do not like. To run away from suffering instead of transcending or overcoming it. I learned about the various modes, trance mode probably being my favorite. If the course had given me anything, more than anything else, I would say it had given me a fresh look and confidence within my practice, which was much needed for me when the course began.

From Leslie Bumstead:

I learned from working with problem-solving mode how oriented I was around perceiving problems and attempting to fix them. I began to notice when I viewed something as a problem and started saying (sometimes out loud) “this is not a problem.” I practiced allowing myself to experience the present moment by feeling anxiety or discomfort instead of immediately trying to figure out how to make things less uncertain or more comfortable. This practice is helping me shift from trying to anticipate and control events or circumstances to experiencing fully whatever arises.

From Brian Pilecki:

I became more aware of how my mind is constantly looking for problems to solve, and how sometimes I can become so attached to solving problems and “productivity” that I am averse to relaxing or unwinding- I just want to keep going! There is some craving here as well, in that I find myself craving that sense of accmoplishment that occurs when I can solve a problem. It’s great to be familiar with this tendency so that I can more easily recognize it when it arises and not feed into it.

I also learned that I can still practice Silent Illumination with a drowsy mind or tired body. So even nights that I didn’t sleep well or feel fatigued from work, I can still pratice well! This has helped my meditation practice, as I’ve been able to sit with drowsiness without as much aversion and self-judgment.

From Neal Buccino:

Studying Illumination with Rebecca and our Dharma friends, and exploring how to bring Silent Illumination into daily life, is so precious. For me, the biggest takeaway was seeing a bit more clearly how the Buddhist path is about making the decision, again and again, to open your eyes and awareness to what's happening in the present moment. This is where things are real, where we can be there for ourselves and those around us, and where we can take notice of habitual modes of operation that can cloud our present clear awareness.

From Annie Chu:

The Dharma class on Illumination by Rebecca Li helped me understand how many unconscious modes of operation contribute to varying degrees of suffering. As we explored these modes, it became clear how deeply ingrained our conditioning is and how it shapes our reactions, perpetuating cycles of suffering. At first, learning about these modes felt intense, overwhelming, and at times, it seemed almost inescapable. However, hearing others' practices has deepened my compassion for how we all get caught in these patterns. The course has also strengthened my belief that the practice offers a genuine path to reducing harm towards ourselves and others. This awareness has nurtured both compassion and a deeper faith in the practice.

Chan Dharma Community

Practice Opportunities

Weekly Sitting Meditation

Monday Mornings, 7:00 to 7:25 AM ET

The Monday morning session includes light neck stretches, recitation of the Four Great Vows, and a 20-minute sitting session.

Thursday Evenings, 9:00 to 9:25 PM ET

The Thursday evening session includes light neck stretches, recitation of the Four Great Vows, a 20-minute sitting session.

*The weekly meditation sessions are intended for Chan Dharma Community members who have practiced with Rebecca Li. All levels of experience are welcome.

Online Sangha Friends Gathering

4th Wednesday of every month

Join us on the fourth Wednesday of every month for an unstructured gathering where we can check in with one another, talk about whatever has come up in the past month, support one another, and stay in touch as a sangha. Each gathering will begin with 10 minutes of meditation, and then everyone will check in and share, and discuss what comes up.

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